Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Someone sent me a text message yesterday--three words that turned off the sun:
She killed herself.
I called the number, barely, it took two tries for the shaking.
Yes, it's true. My friend is dead.

I called her best friend--"What are you telling me?"
Jesus, hold me, her pain is taking me down.

Hours and hours of weeping--
but for one, my friend--
smiling always as she faded
always smiling

5 Fear and trembling have beset me;
horror has overwhelmed me.
6 I said, "Oh, that I had the wings of a dove! .

I would fly away and be at rest-
7 I would flee far away

and stay in the desert;

Selah

7 comments:

Heidi Renee April 29, 2008 at 8:21 AM  

oh alice... no words. i am so sorry. praying here.

wilsonian April 29, 2008 at 6:04 PM  

My heart is breaking for you. For her. For all who love her.

Praying salve for your heart.
xo

Kel April 29, 2008 at 7:28 PM  

turned off the sun indeed!
hope your plea for being held by the Father is somehow helped by us holding you in our hearts

ukok May 1, 2008 at 1:45 AM  

I am so very sorry for your loss. I am praying for the soul of your loved one and for you and for all whom mourn her loss.

May she rest in peace. Amen.

Steve F. May 2, 2008 at 7:00 PM  

I am so, so, sorry.

It's been seventeen years since I got the same message. I remember the sense of being kicked in the gut, of everything going gray.

My heart cries out for you, for comfort, for gentle memories, for God's love to surround you like a warm blanket on a cool night. It's an image I saw in my mind as soon as I read the reference on Erin's post.

Hugs from a distant friend.

codepoke May 4, 2008 at 11:35 AM  

Sorry I'm late.

I've been there, and I'm so sorry. Praise the Lord for the healing that's already showing through in your latest post, and praise the Lord for the part of the wound that never heals.

trace May 11, 2008 at 5:18 PM  

sad to read this

will pray - for you and those your friend left behind